coming home from A Chorus Line done at a local community college and remembering what I did for love, a misty nostalgia floods me as I remember seeing the show on Broadway and while virtually no theatre experience compares with the original performance on Broadway, I still have the memories and the feelings and no no they can't take that away from me... I am such a sucker for theatre...

it's the energy... and that is a dual edge for it is the energy that attracts and repels, the energy that combines and divides, for if you are aware, you know it can not be faked (and just about everybody tries)... a true singer or musician would understand...

and this is why so many are alone, for the creative energy is a fickle companion... the muse does not often like to share outside of the self unless there is a mirror and much libation (or deeper communion and compatibility) involved...

and me, I usually say too much... especially when I am moved, when I am turned on, when I am real with my emotions... I scare people off, drive them away with unabashed emotion... I wonder, sometimes, if anyone really wants honesty (oh yeah Billy Joel, but besides him)...

sure, make fun of my deepest fears and most sorrowful woes, why don't I?... why not, I'm kind of numb to them anyway (or is it just that I've come to be amused by the life as it is and accept the solitary experience... and I used to whine and moan about loneliness so much, whatever happened to that faux-needy pathos?... gone with the wind?)...

but the four year old still stands stretched to the sky as the magic of theatre races through the veins (and arteries too) and I continue to love bouncing around this stage called life... never mind the odd or worries looks from the stiff folk on the sideline, just give it your all and let your all give it to you... and if the whole world settles for less, you don't have to (I sure don't, which could be a chorus for a lonely old blues number, come to think of it, but that's besides the point)...

theatre gets me to rambling, in case you didn't notice... I mean, I've already bashed the heck out of the experience elsewhere because, unfortunately, either it deserved it or I have become a New York theatre snob in my old age... but you know they only call it elitist drivel because they are beneath us... and contempt too...

perhaps it was the inspiration of a comment that amused me into playing the role of critic and know-it-all, but then, there's some part of truth in every bit of humor (or else it wouldn't be funny... have I not been funny?... not at all?... oh dear, perhaps I should start again)...

hello, how are you?...

yeah, well, you see what happens when we start again, don't you?... anything can happen, that's what... and I dedicate that to anyone who is not offended or indifferent, cuz they need more help than I can give them... and if the person (or people) who actually personally inspired the rhyming portion of this rambling entry just by being so beautiful I could not speak wish to come forward and collect their prize, you know where to find me... did I mention I often say too much?...

ah, but like an old song said, and all I have to do is dream...

and between falling in love with teenage rock stars and saving wayward kids from lives of decadence and abuse, I pretend to be a folk hero singing protest songs on street corners for free... wait, here's a few verses coming along now..

you just can't take me to a Broadway musical and expect me not to be rambling on and on in broken prose and semi-metered rhyme for the rest of the night (and I would too, if I didn't have any respect for the stuff I will be doing at work tomorrow, but alas, I actually put my money where my mouth is and live up to my ideals, dangit... I can be such a party pooper sometimes... laughing all the way as the party shall continue in bed, even if only in my dreams)...

all ego tripping and self-mockery aside, you should see me when I really get started...

but enough seriousness (after all, there's no one here to fall in love with in the flesh, so all I've got are words {and old songs and memories to inspire new babble and rhymes} tonight so it's play time)... the irony, however, is that I seem to be wanting to fall in love with a revolutionary, much to my amusement... perhaps I am flashing back to Evita, or better yet, Les Miserables... and it was the best of times and it was the worst of times for a far far better thing I do than I've ever done and a far far better rest I go to than I've ever known...

paraphrasing is almost as flattering as imitation, dontcha know... and I could so die for love if it would actually make things better than they are, but heck a life is a terrible thing to waste... still, when I see eyes that beg for attention, for nurturing, for affection, for seriousness and laughter and adoration... I melt... and I've seem eyes like those a few times in this life... just this summer, in fact...

and I would give everything I own... sheesh, that's a beautiful song (playing in my head at the moment)... don't take your love for granted, people, it's a horrible way to die... did I mention that I sometimes say too much?...

and what I did for love... but it's no sacrifice at all... and I haven't even gotten started and it's time to roll over and close my eyes... there's a long weekend ahead and sleeping tonight will allow me to enjoy it much more... tomorrow night there's New Found Glory, The Early November, Cartel, and Hit the Lights at the House of Blues and then Saturday starts as early as I can get up with the 100+ bands at the 12+ hour Deland Original Music Festival and that gets interrupted by 30 Seconds to Mars, HeadAutomatica, Receiving Ends of Sirens, Cobra Starship at the Hard Rock Café in the evening, dangit, too much overlapping music and fun (unless, of course, I use my secret power to be in two places at one, but then everybody would know my secret power so I won't use it this time)...

hey, what's that?... something about real life in a semi-coherent (unobscure) paragraph?... it must be time to head off la la land... so to the fun and freeing voices of Meg and Dia I sail off toward sweet slumbers (golden, even) on the wings of hope and in dreams of love, for all and for one and for me... for surely (and even Shirley), I've said enough for tonight...